How an Injury Made Me A Better Competitor
By Patrick Donabedian
Solve this riddle: Within a 7-man bracket, two competitors were submitted via kneebar and one competitor executed two kneebars. Who limped out with an injured knee?
Of all the full-contact martial arts, Jiu Jitsu, not having strikes, is widely considered among the safest to practice. This is why 12 year old girls, 60 year old men, and 22 year old super athletes can all train alike.
BUT injuries, specifically leg injuries, are pervasive. Especially in competition.
That’s why I usually stack the cards in my favor by only signing up for tournaments if I have no nagging injuries, a full training camp, and the entire Armenian/Italian tribe to support me in the stands. As a result, I rarely compete.
Then when I do compete, win or lose, an injury still occurs.
There are two glaring problems with this approach. One is with performance psychology — competition is always a novel experience where nerves and anxiety limit me to a mere 60% mental bandwidth. Second is the increased vulnerability to injury.
It’s been easy to blame injuries on the opponent — he was spazzy, he had fury, he flouted the rules, etc. But I’ve never looked inward — how might my own body, my own mind, be contributing to this? Am I achieving a flow state or a state of stiffening?
Let’s investigate by diving into my stream of consciousness at a recent Subfighter Tournament where you’ll also find the answer to the riddle:
‘Patrick Donabedian’ rings over the loudspeakers. Whereismybag? Whocantakevideo? Phonebatteryisdying?! All flash as one word in my mind.
We slap hands. Goforthetakedown. Chicks dig the take down. I plant my feet. He shoots. I sprawl. Right leg begins to tingle. Ignore it. Play bottom game. My guard gets passed. 1:45 left. One option left. Turtle. Scramble. Kneebar. My hand raised.
Shouts, applause, hugs, personal relief.
Then throbbing in the back of my knee. Panic, Dread. Not this again — ACLMCLMeniscusLCLRupture. Concatenated panic thoughts pile on quicker this time — $600MRIRehabMomWorriedSurgery.
Regret cascades more slowly, more torturously — What am I doing in a high school gymnasium in Dana Point on a Sunday? I should be at a picnic with my family. I should be rebalancing my investment portfolio. Taking a weekend vacation. Healing the bay. Why am I spending my Sunday with ground dwelling weirdos trying to cripple each other?
My rash guard turns from half sweaty to half smelly.
‘Patrick Donabedian’ again over the loudspeaker. I reinduce panic. I like panic more than regret. Panic is a primordial tool for survival. With regret I’ll dig my own grave.
Protecttheknee. Goafterhis. Playbottomgame. Thisismyonlychance. KarateKid. Go!
Slap hands. I Imanari Roll. No beans. Tussle. Honeyhole entry. Invert. Kneebar. 0:02 left. He taps. Gold!
Lesson: The injury took my mind from external circumstances to internal goals. Despite my panic, regret, and other symptoms of an emotionally unstable adult, I went from worrying about ‘whocantakevideo?!’ to ‘how will I protect my knee and still win’ — a clear goal.
I plan to take this half healed knee to ADCC trials in two weeks to further test my theory that frequency of competition will allow flow state and disallow stiffening which leads to injury.
Note: For those who don’t train jiu jitsu, my going for the kneebar was not a sadistic revenge tactic. The mechanics of this attack happen to not put pressure on my own knee. And both opponents tapped out in time, so no one was left limping except me :/
